I Feel Sorry For The Queen of England

"I feel sorry for the queen of England."

Not a sentence I ever thought would pass from my lips, but there it is.

The hubby has been back at work this week, although his cough still persists. He is convinced I have caught a milder version of what he had and claims many coworkers and their wives have had similar complaints this week. I've been a new kind of beat, the kind where you're too tired to even shower. Not pretty. Literally.

It has taken a lot to get out of bed at all. As horrible as it is to hear anyone else feels less than desired, it is nice to attempt to convince myself that it's not all in my head. It also doesn't help that all I want to eat is cereal and jello (not combined). My get up and go is.. gone.

When the husband returned home from work this week, we've sat together on our oversized basement couches in the darkness, curtains drawn, watching Showtime's The Tudors. I have to admit that it is easy for me to look at the world and think what terrible times we live in... If this show has done anything, it had made me appreciate the good old present day. Holy crap. And how our lives are wonderfully free of drama in this house. How fortunate we are! I think I've had about ten aneurysms per episode. Those historical figures, granted they and their lives are fictionalized partly for the show, still make my brain hurt.

It is also fun to continually cross my arms and mutter to my husband, "Your gender. Oh. My. God."

It helps that although I was an excellent student, I am terrible at all things related to recall, so I never know what happens next. Besides, there were like 20 kings of England or something, right? Who can blame me? It is easier to point fingers considering I had forgotten how Ann Boleyn... Yeah. When the hubby mentioned losing her head later, I yelled at him emphatically, "Why did you have to tell me that?! You've ruined the ending!" It sounded familiar when he brought it up, but I would never have remembered that on my own.

I do hope that if I am lucky enough to age and grow very, very old, that the caverns of my mind will open and instead of general Alzheimer's, I will have some kind of wonderful disease where I remember everything locked away in there. Think of all the state capitals! The whole math thing with the letters instead of numbers! The food pyramid! How to use a sewing machine! What, didn't everyone get that last one in junior high?

Basically, I hope all my doodles on the cafeteria paper placemats are drawings of a map of the world with the correct location and labeling of all the countries.

In those cobwed covered rooms of my mind, I am sure there are many large filing cabinets full of facts about royalty and European history. Perhaps they are there for all the reasons this show dusts off and places on pedestals in the entryway. The plague. The poor and the rich. Oh, the joys of religion. And I know it's Showtime, so it's inevitable, but wow, could there be anyone in the castle the guys were not banging? I suppose it is not so fictionalized. How did humanity even survive until now? We were lucky to keep our reproductive abilities after that time period.

It seemed every storyline with Queen Katherine included me turning to the hubby and asking, "I do not know how she doesn't go all stabby stabby on everyone." The show in general makes me feel "stabby stabby". It is fascinating. And always calming to simply sit, rest, and be with the hubby and our 4-legged kids scattered around us.

As to our next official date? It's coming. Sometime after we get the expired car plates taken care of, the thousand errands ran, and the case of Neither One of Us Has A Working Phone Anymore solved. Stupid technology. But I'll take today over the 1500s any day.