Cavalia Date

To say that I was excited to see Cavalia is an understatement. I told my hubby that it was like we were going to see the supermodels of horses, only supermodels that I want to see since regular supermodels make me all rage-y.

Although I did wear these, and may I say, "Meow."

Or neigh. Whatever.

They were surprisingly and wonderfully comfortable. I swear.

Plus, I look so much thinner at 8 feet tall!

Before we left, the hubby filled his time waiting for me to get Mav ready for our departure by taking her picture.

She says, "Get out and give me my treat balls!"

Then, the hubby turned to Atlas and Sweet Pea.

They couldn't have cared less if we were still home or not.

It's like he knows he's going to hate it.

But he loves me, so it's okay.

And yes, I do decorate with the laser disc.

Yes, we do have the laser disc player.

No, we don't watch them. We're not neanderthals.

We were early, mostly because between the time I bought our tickets and the show, Cavalia started selling tickets for parking that you were supposed to buy with your show tickets. I went online a couple days ago to see if they had better seats than ours available in case we wanted to see the show again during its run in St. Louis. That is when I noticed you were supposed to buy a ticket for parking with your damn show tickets and had a little spaz attack. That had definitely not been there when I got our tickets. Sigh.

The hubby told me to go ahead and get the parking ticket, so I did. I hate doing new things in that I don't like not knowing where I'm going, where I'm parking, the lay of the land, and so on. We left 90 minutes before the show, which was when the doors opened. We made good time and I snapped this photo from the car as we drove by on the underpass.

Let's pretend I'm not freaking out right about now.

"HORSES!"

Well, my husband, always good with directions, drove us by a million parking lots that we could have parked in without our lovely parking ticket. I started telling him, "I have enough cash that we can just park in one of these if you want."

He pulled into the actual part with the tents and guess what?

Boo-yah! Parking nirvana!

There was a small line to get in, but we walked through the tents without much wait time and found our seats with a little help. There were already a good chunk of people there. For a giant cathedral-tent-amphitheater type of thing, it was remarkably cozy. I wish they had allowed cameras. I know my descriptions won't do the show justice.

We had great seats - just off center, on an aisle, 10th row back. The first set of seats you could get without having to buy tickets where you meet the horses afterwards. Do I regret not spending an extra hundred bucks to meet the horses? HOLY F-YES.

The horses were beyond beautiful. They have over 45 horses in the stables, all either stallions or geldings (neutered stallions). No ladies. Males, especially stallions, are notoriously difficult when all together. They usually don't tolerate being around each other without fighting breaking out. It is kind of amazing that they are all together and do this show.

They don't use every horse in every performance, so we probably saw 25 or so horses. There were lots of white horses, 3 paints which were brown and white, and a lot of deep chestnut brown ones. There was even a mini-horse. Stun-ning. Every one of them.

The actual show was almost 3 hours long with a half hour intermission. That sounds like a long intermission but it wasn't if you wanted to use the restroom or get a souvenir or a snack (check, check, and check). They had concessions like you were at the movie theater. We were able to walk around and get back to our seats with time to spare, which is impressive considering how many people were there. They say the place seats over 2,000 people, and that sucker was full. It's hard to describe the show but I'll write here about some of the more memorable details and specific acts.

The band and singer were live during the show, and they followed the horses instead of following a set score. The set was lovely. There was this huge rectangular stage. The size of it is hard to describe. You had to turn your head all the way to one side and then quickly to the other - you could not take in the whole stage with a look. This was difficult when acts were happening on all parts of the stage and when acts were entering from both ends of the stage.

There was a sand floor, and a large curtain that changed with the scenery that could be raised, making the area twice as large with the back part being opened up. They could shut off and open up certain parts, so for example, if the horses were to run in a giant circle, they could. If they left the area open and the horses were to cross from front to back in the middle of the stage, then they would have to jump if they didn't take the long, gradually-raised-oval way around. If the horses were supposed to just run in front of the audience, they could shut off the back and then have that front run be in the spotlight.

Lots of the scenery was semi-see-through, and the band was about 2 stories up in the very back behind a gauze curtain. If they were lit up, you could see them, almost like ghosts. Otherwise, they were there but hidden from view.

There were fog and snow machines (the snow from the snow machines literally made the audience gasp when it came down at its fullest). They released leaves from the ceiling as well, as the show was sort of separated into seasons. Even though I was sure the horses would be the most beautiful thing in the show, there were parts where heavy rain fell through the middle of the stage, all the way from one end to the other, and in the darkness, they were able to light up the raindrops as they fell with this breathtaking vision of a giant (think 3 stories tall) white horse. It moved and ran and bucked, mane flowing.

If I'm being honest, I think the show we saw wasn't their best show. But that kind of made it even more interesting. One of the things they emphasize is that they don't force the horses to do anything. And some of the horses that were in our show were like, "Listen, Buddy. I don't wanna."

One of the first acts was a unbridled, unsaddled, completely free white horse. There was a little lake in the middle of the stage, and a woman danced all around in her long, ribbon-y, flowing costume. I think the horse usually interacts with her and drinks from her hands and all that, but this horse was sort of looking at her like, "Seriously?" At one point, the woman jumped up in the water, did a twirl, and flicked a little wave of water at the horse very forcefully with her feet as she completed a full circle in the air. The horse sort of stood there like, "Try that again. Do you realize I outweigh you by 1500 pounds? You are annoying the crap out of me."

And then the curtain on one end of the stage opened and that horse trotted out of there like, "La dee da."

Sometimes, one of the performers would ride a horse fully bridled and saddled around the ring. And we would all clap. Oh, St. Louis, how we like to clap at things. It's hilarious. Anyway, there was A LOT of clapping. During these times, I would think to myself, "Golly gee whiz, good job, Sir. Hats off to you. You rode a horse."

Then, you'd have another act where these aerial performers were whipping all over the damn place while riders circled on horses. The performers would flip all around, and they would reach out to the riders, and the horses would gallop around the stage as the riders held onto the fingertips of the aerialists. The performers on wires just floated with them. It was amazing, especially when you consider the costumes. Human and horse hair was long and flowing, and the performers' costumes were very elaborate. Very animated in movement and very colorful. Any normal horse would be all kinds of spooked by this crazy person in long glittery garb in the air flying next to them, right out of eyesight. To their credit, no matter what, the horses didn't seem bothered by anything like that during the show.

They had 6 bridled and saddled white horses with riders at one point doing all these synchronized moves. The costumes were so long that they puddled on the ground at the sides of the horses. That mixed with their shimmering colors and long human and horse hair... And the singing, which was essentially entirely a soprano making "ah ah ah ahhh ah ah" noises and not words for the whole show, and string accompaniment...

More than once, I had to keep myself from leaning over to the hubby and going, "One ring to rule them all!"

The horses would all stand facing us in a line, and then they would walk. Sideways. Crossing their front feet over one another. It's been a while but since I used to have a horse and kept him boarded at a working cattle farm that had lots of other horses, I know a little about the animal. They do not like to do stuff like that. There were a lot of little tricks in the show where the horses would do something that seems simple, but I'd think, "Oh, wow. That's pretty good. I know horses don't like to do that. They don't do those moves naturally." I especially thought this when they had the horses do a lot of dressage alone and in tight clumps.

One of the most memorable parts of the show was when a rider wiped out in spectacular fashion. Here is a link to a Cavalia video. I recognize the people and horses from the show we saw, so even though it's a little slow to watch, it's recent. The red headed woman in the video is the one who fell. At one point there, she is riding 2 horses while standing, one horse under each foot, horses side by side. In the show, there were 4 pairs of horses like this, each pair with a rider standing on top with one foot on each horse. In the show, they were, ahem, racing. Racing. RACING.

They turned the corner of the large oval stage, a very huddled together pack, right on top of each other, and the woman was in second place. She fell off quickly, so fast we couldn't tell what happened. She belly flopped to the ground between her own horses, hitting FACE FIRST.

Face first.

Complete face plant.

And then there were all the horses behind her. Thankfully, she rolled quickly out of the way, but it was very close. The audience audibly gasped. She popped up after a minute, gave a great big smile to the audience, and took a little humorous bow to our thunderous applause. Lord. If I had had time to think, I would have thought, "Oh, we just saw a horrible death where a woman was trampled."

During a similar routine, 2 performers stood on the ground and held out a long pole. They raised it to their waists. The pairs with riders standing on top of them would run and jump over the poles, horse and rider flying over easily.

Then, the performers on the ground got second performers to sit on their shoulders, raising the pole very, very high. I grabbed the hubby's leg at this point and actually said, "No."

The first time, of course, the man on the pair of horses just ducked while standing as they ran through. The audience laughed.

Then, he came around again, fast. The performer jumped up and over as the horses ran underneath. He landed on his feet again, one horse under each foot. And those horses were not trotting. They were running. It was very impressive. Terrifying, but impressive.

There was also an act where 6 unbridled, unsaddled, free chocolate brown horses came out with one performer standing on the ground. Now, one of these little bastards was in a mood. Which should not have been funny. Of course, it was.

He and one other horse from the group went to the side of the stage. He nipped at the other horse, refusing to let him by to join the others in the middle with the performer. Nip, nip, nip. The performer finally got him to come over, and the other followed, and then the 6 did these amazing little runs and zigzags around the performer.

Still, the little punky one nipped at his fellow horses and kicked his back feet up at everyone. It was like he agreed to do all that was required but he wasn't going to be that cool about it. There was never real viciousness but you also couldn't just pass it off as play. The tricks were done in a very close pack, so the 6 horses were all over each other. You literally couldn't have put a piece of paper between them most of the time. To get totally free horses to do moves that that is truly amazing.

The performer would then instruct the horses to run in a circle around him. Now, one of them and not the one who was being a little a**, decided he wanted to sort of stick to the game plan but throw in an extra set of fun for himself. That horse was adorably hilarious. The stage was open, but there was a barrier between the front half of the stage and the back. It was over waist high and was the length of the stage. The horses therefore were supposed to stay in the front half of the stage and do their act with the performer there.

However, every single time the guy asked the horses to do a full circle around him, that little bugger was like, "Weeeeeeeeeee! I jumps over the barrier and make a SUPER FULL oval run ALL the way around the stage!" He jumped up, ran around the back of the stage, jumped down, and joined the others. He'd run through the front of the stage with everyone doing the zigs and zags and turns and such, and then ha ha! Big oval time again! Jump up, over the barricade, around the back, then down, join the others. Heh heh heh. The poor performer just sort of kept looking at him and couldn't do a thing about it.

It was like the performer was thinking, "Oh, he's going around in the circle with the other horses! Got it out of his system!" Cue performer sigh. Then, "Wait! Oop. No. There he goes again. Bye, Horsey!"

And the horse was all jump, run, jump, "I'm back! He-ey! How's it hanging?" Zig, zag, and he's off again doing his solo fun run.

Good times. I guess we all like a little rebel once in a while.

There was also trick riding, where a fully bridled and saddled horse would run by at lightening speed with a rider/acrobat doing things like clinging upside down with one foot attached as they raced by. We've never seen Cirque de Soileil, but I imagine the performers were similar to the ones in those shows. There were a lot of acrobatics and, you know, general "I didn't know the human body could do that?" type of things happening. Also, it made me think about how I was never that flexible and how my goal weight is now my birth weight. I mean, I was there once, right? I can get back to it.

All in all, the show was great to see. Hard to describe, although my husband certainly was able to do so. In the car he said what we had just seen was, "A French-Romanian rodeo."

The husband tolerated the show, but I knew he didn't want to see it again. We compromised by buying the DVDs for me at the souvenir stand. And he doesn't know it yet, but I also bought something last week that will serve as a wonderful reminder of our Cavalia time. I will be taking his photo when that is unveiled. So stay tuned for that.

The Endangered Wolf Center Date

My husband and I left for our tour at the wolf sanctuary an hour before were we supposed to arrive. I was not aware that the sanctuary is 10 minutes from the house. We were so ridiculously early that we turned around and drove through my favorite of the St. Louis County Parks (Lone Elk Park). I'll detail our pre-date time there in the next post (babies! I love baby animals! This is such a great park!).

We still managed to be early for the tour. The entrance had a small sign I would have missed without my husband's excellent eye. There was a wide, tall, electrified and automatic gate outfitted with an elaborate keypad. This gate was flanked by an equally intimidating fence. It was right off of the first side road from the highway. I would have driven right by and just assumed it was a "no trespassing" type of place and not given it any more thought.

We waited for someone to come and let the one car in front of us (and us) inside. More and more cars came, and we all got in a line after signing in and being let through the gate. We then formed a caravan behind the tour guide's vehicle. We drove farther and farther back. It was all trees and greenery. There was a distinct lack of people. The only thing proving anyone had ever been there was a paved road that turned into a dirt road.

The actual wolf sanctuary is located in a small area within the Washington University's Tyson Research Center. The university has 2,000 acres of seclusion and forest. We parked along the dirt road and went into a bunker that had been used for ammunition during World War II. There were a lot of WWII buildings throughout the research center, but most were now hidden by grasses and trees. The bunker we went into had been transformed into an educational center and a gift shop. We learned a little about wolves in general and then about all the endangered wolves on the property. After that, we headed out on our walking tour of the enclosures.

There were a lot of people. If I had to wager a guess I'd say 35-40 at least. The husband was great at sticking with me and booking it when I got all determined to walk close to the front of the group (which was most of the time). With so many people, it was often hard to get up close enough for a good view. I also liked to hear what the guides were saying, but we had to be right next to them in order to hear anything. There were some smaller children and a bit of noise (although it probably would have been just as noisy without them due to the sheer number of people).

One college-aged girl was on her cell the entire time. She also was wearing a somewhat dressy dress. I don't know what to say about that. Even I wore sunscreen (70 SPF!) and bug repellent. It's been over 100 degrees for what feels like weeks and that day's prediction was low 90s. It was a break but still obviously a hot summer day. Every step it took to get to taking the tour, from learning about the existence of the sanctuary in the first place to making reservations to visit, lends itself to the knowledge that this is an outdoor, walking-in-nature type of experience. If even I know this, there is no way anyone can be surprised. If I think there is any chance I can wear the least hike-y outfit I can, then I go with that. Today was comfortable sandals, a white tee, and a modest light khaki skirt. Even I will admit it wasn't pretty. I don't really know who forced this girl to come but it was kind of sad.

Most of the visitors were pretty appropriate and respectful. Because so many of the animals were skittish, we were asked to be as quiet as possible so as to not scare them off. They wanted us to have as much of a chance as possible to see as many of the animals as possible.

My good hubby just kept holding my hand with his non-camera hand and kept up as I rushed to be in the front section of the group. I love that he still holds my hand.

The first animal we saw was the Swift Fox. As large as a small house cat and nocturnal, we were informed that it was a treat for us to see one since few tours ever get a glance. He was so little, and it was difficult to keep an eye on him through the double chain link fence. Still, we were able to spend several key minutes watching the little critter.

It didn't help that there were several raccoons who had MacGyvered their way into the pen to steal the fox food. They made a quick, clumsy, and dramatic escape. One actually had an epic fail as he misjudged distance when performing his Cirque Soleil move from the tree to the outer top of the fence. He fell all the way to the ground, landing on his back, the thud louder than everyone's murmurs and conversations about the raccoons. He was fine, though. They all ran off without injury or issue.

The next enclosure housed 8 Grey Mexican Wolves. This is where something started happening to me that I cannot put it words. I love animals but this was something different. There was something majestic and stunning about these wolves when I saw them. It took my breath away.

These 8 wolves were siblings. They were very active in their cage and would soon be going elsewhere for more wolf conservation and breeding efforts. The National Fish and Wildlife Service (or some similarly named government entity - I was listening but there were wolves... and feelings... and wolves. Forgive me!) oversees all things wolves. It keeps records and determines what wolves go where, who breeds with who, monitors each one in the wild by microchip, and so on. Not just at this center but everywhere. They have sort of an all-encompassing view over it all and make judgements based on the whole. It makes sense if there are only 14 wolves of this species or that species that are pure and desirable for breeding. They're trying to not only increase the population but also keep the bloodlines strong. I do not envy them and their responsibilities. 

The hubby got excellent pictures considering how difficult it was to shoot through all these fences. In person, it was a little easier to see. They were so gorgeous. Granted, with the awful heatwave, they had shed their coats and were much smaller than they will appear to be in the winter, but they were still large and beautiful animals.

They came right up the fence and rubbed on it. They were not doing it to show affection but to let us know that this was their territory. The center has been around since 1971 and has a very specific approach to saving these endangered creatures. Their goal is to increase their populations and to selectively breed and then release as many wolves as possible back into the wild (as determined by aforementioned government agency). There is no warm wolf/human interaction. The goal at the center is not to gain the trust or affection of the wolves. They do not want the wolves to lose their fear of humans. At the same time, it is blatantly obvious that everything the people at the center are doing is for the best for the wolves and that every thought and action comes from a pure, respectful, and loving place.

After seeing the 8, we walked up a steep hill to another enclosure. There were 2 more Mexican Grays. Rocky was the male and had been through a lot. His story is on their website at Rocky's Story and he was almost completely blind. He will never be released into the wild but has a good life at the sanctuary. He and his companion stayed far away from our large group.

I don't know how my husband even got the picture of him (on the left) and his female friend (on the right). The enclosures were very large. They were not created for people to view wolves. They were created for wolves period. The atmosphere of the sanctuary, from the inside of the bunker that housed the gift shop to the gravel road we walked on next to the enclosures, definitely made me feel like there just wasn't any other viable option. It was for the peace of mind and the needs of the wolves, to put the least amount of stress on them as possible. This is why when we couldn't see very much in the following 2 enclosures, I didn't feel upset at that one bit.

In the next enclosure was the red wolf,  but she hid well and we were told this was expected of her. Her story can be found at Inapa's Story and it shows the resilience of these animals. Her name not only has it's own meaning but can also be interpreted by sound since Inapa had an injury where she lost (and then "needed") a paw.

After that, we came to the Wild African Dog enclosures. They were asleep in lumps and were really hard to see with the sun, the fences, and their coats hiding them in the taller grass. Behind their enclosure was the one housing the female grey wolf with her 5 puppies. We saw them moving and kind of could pick them out but it was a definitely a stretch. They put her in that enclosure so that she would feel the safest that she could as she raised her cubs. They didn't want tours walking right by and making her feel like she needed to protect and defend her babies.

The hubby stood in front of the Wild African Dog enclosures in this photo.

 

The last 2 enclosures had several more Mexican Greys. This one ran along the fence as well. I kept saying hi to it and waving at it. This is one of the few shots without my fingers covering the left side of the picture. He wasn't afraid of me but when a woman a few feet down placed her hands on the rail in front of her, he jumped up about a foot. Just the movement scared him.

Next to this enclosure, a new pack of very wild wolves was running. We were told it was also very rare for a tour to see them at all, since they are the most wary of all the wolves at the sanctuary. It was an incredible experience.

Um... There was also a wall of contributors. Betty White was on there. But, my favorite had to be the following. I like how the tile not only complements her in relation to her profession but also to her actual self. Way to go, Sabrina. I may not know you but now I know you're great. So that's good. I can put that great mystery to rest. I lose a lot of sleep wondering if Melissa Joan Hart is a... witch. Which she was. On television. But not in life. She's great in life. It says so right there.

I'm only teasing there. It just cracked me up. Honestly, I think it's great she's been a part of this. I just find it kind of funny the way that is worded and how it's a little tribute to her. But if I ever win the lottery (which is even more of a long shot then you're thinking, since I don't play the lottery), I solemnly swear that I will give a big old chunk of money to the Endangered Wolf Sanctuary and that my wolf engraving will say something like "Happy Wife: A Decent Blogger And A Pretty Okay (Most Of The Time) Person".

Until I find that leprechaun (I'm branching out now, pretty soon there will be so many ways in which we can become rich that it'll have to happen sometime, right?), we went home and went online to become general members to support the center financially in our own little way. No tile for us, but that is what we could manage. I also want to find a painting (or more realistically a print of a painting) of a wolf to hang somewhere in our home. I want to remember that day. I want to be able to see something that reminds me of the way I felt. So far, I've looked a little online and have found only one we're considering, but even the print is a bit out of our budget. Once we do have something like that in our home, and with the addition of time, maybe I'll be able to process all of this into words that will do this experience the justice it deserves.

Going into the date, I didn't know what to expect. It wasn't a jovial, light hearted experience. It wasn't Duran Duran. But, it wasn't sad or entirely upsetting either. It was heavy, and deep. I'm an animal lover, which isn't a secret, but this was above and beyond what I normally feel around and about animals. There was something about that place and those animals. Some that aren't even found in the wild anymore. It really affected me. I didn't want to cuddle them (okay, if they wanted to be cuddled, that would be a lie). It was so much more than enough to simply see them and to learn about them. Their stories and history and struggle to continue surviving (existing!) were jarring. It's really hard to combine all the things they are - precious, predators, beautiful, graceful, ghost-like. They're almost myth. Yet, I see my Mav in part of them, the dog I love that sleeps against my feet and shares our home and life. Something so tangible that can't quite be touched. I left wanting only good things for them, some sort of hopeful spark starting to burn inside of me. Along with a desire to recapture the feeling I had when seeing them as they ran. To never let myself forget that feeling. And to do what I can, even in my small way, to help them.

The Randomness That is Don King (AKA The Mark Wahlberg/Will Ferrell Date)

On Tuesday, it was announced that St. Louis had won a facebook competition where Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg would come and do "the other premier" for The Other Guys on Thursday. Theater location? The little quiet theater the hubby and I always go to in Chesterfield, Missouri. Yeah. So weird.

Tickets were not for sale - they were given away by radio stations and so on. With the possible furniture delivery we were expecting, we didn't give it too much thought. As Thursday went on, and the furniture movers were a no show picking up the stuff in northern Indiana, we knew not to expect them. I threw on my bright red Big Bang Theory Bazinga shirt and we headed over to Chesterfield around 4:30 pm (the "red carpet" was supposed to happen at 6:30).

We drove by and were amazed at the crowd. Instead of parking and getting a closer look, we went to Sonic and ate supper. Mmmmmm. Popcorn chicken, mozzarella sticks, and a Campfire Blast. So tasty. Which led me to be in a good enough mood to let my husband persuade me to have one more look at the premier location.

We parked and decided to walk around. If facing the theater, the red carpet was set up on the right hand side. We parked in the far left parking lot, where the line was going around the building.

 This is me saying, "I'm not getting in that line.

Let's just go look at the red carpet part and then leave."

We passed the main part of the theater.

Sweet Jesus, look at all these people!

When we get to the left side, we are faced with a lot of random space.

So we stand by the rail. 

I think we may have just cut a line that didn't know what it was doing. We decide, since it's a quarter past five already, we'll just stand here a bit. It's a different experience. Some people have been there since 7 am. We just take in the crowd, read the signs, and talk about how strange it is that this is happening at our movie theater.

We almost die laughing at the "Say 'hello' to your mother for me" sign for Mark Wahlberg.

Oooo, we say, someone has a lot of balls. And they're gonna get kicked. By Marky Mark.

Time passes and someone informs the line that there is a crapload of space to fill in where they can actually see the red carpet. Other St. Louis "celebrities" are supposed to show up before the main event. There are radio station DJs with microphones talking to the crowd and doing a few ticket giveaways.

This man arrives.

My husband yells the following to me several times over the crowd,

"It's B.B. King! It's B.B. King!"

I end up being really glad I did not yell "Hi, B.B. King" out as he walked right by us, since it turns out, he was Don King. Don King, as the radio DJs mentioned several times, was not really expected at this event. He randomly showed up and walked the road part of the red carpet and the red carpet part of the red carpet. Up and down. Several times. At one point, half an hour after he got here and after some other people had walked the red carpet, I heard one DJ say, "Hey, there's Don King again. He's wandering the red carpet some more." The DJ tried and failed to curb his own laughter.

Then, as magically as he had appeared, Don King left. Didn't really say anything or do anything other than wander. He had worn a very sparkly jacket with his face on the back of it and waved a handful of small American flags. I don't know what else to say about it. "What the what" sums it up, I think.

Other "celebrities" came. If you think Mayor Slay showing up counts. Sure, why not. Then, Rampage and Fredbird ran through the crowd (they're the Rams and Cardinals mascots). I was actually a little excited to see Redbird. Love ya, Cards! Fans dressed up in costumes, most like they were in the movie Elf. Some costumes were more elaborate than others. There were a lot of people with cowbells.

There was a rumor some Rams players were going to show up (to which I said to my husband, "Awesome! Not one person here one will know their names." A man who was not my husband found this very funny.). Then, a handful of Blues hockey players walked through instead, which would have been great if we had known who they were. We just saw some tall thin white guys in dress shirts and slacks walk by and the crowd sort of murmured to itself saying, "They cannot be football players." Not particularly tall or broad shouldered and looking like they might cash in at a buck twenty soaking wet. I think to myself, "If they are our football team, I think this rocket scientist in her Big Bang Theory shirt just figured out why we never win any games."

When the Rams players did show up, they did not walk through the part we were at. They only walked on the actual red carpet and therefore bypassed about 75% of all the people waiting and lining the rest of the walking areas. I think it would have been cool to see them. We've thought maybe we'd go to a game this year. For our exciting dating that we're doing. So that wasn't too impressive that the players totally ignored basically everybody. Great job, Rams, sucking in a whole new way there.

Everyone else who came to walk the red carpet also only walked the short actual carpet distance. We couldn't see any of them but honestly, if the rapper Chingy had spent time walking by us, I would have only known who he was by listening to the yells of those around me who would have recognized him. I could be stuck on an elevator with Chingy and I'd never know.

See in the photo how there is a walkway on the road right in front of us? Yeah, so it was just Don King taking laps around that and no one else really seemed to care. The actual red carpet is in front of the big lights. There is a section of people between us and that (which no one could see over). The crowd around me started to get upset, thinking that the stars they had come to see wouldn't walk where most of us could see them.

I asked my husband, "How much of a mob do you think there'll be when Mark Wahlberg and Will Ferrell don't walk by everyone over here?"

He replied, "Big. Won't be good."

We jokingly embraced and I said, "If this is how we die, it's been a good ride with you, Honey!"

6:30 came and went. Every time a plane flew overheard or a helicopter whirled by, the crowd went crazy. Finally, about an hour late, the dark SUVs pulled up and out came Mark Wahlberg and Will Ferrell. They did not just walk the red carpet. They came through our area first, and although we hadn't waited all day like some people, we were in prime real estate. My husband stood behind me on the curb with the camera and filmed it. I stood right in front of him, my feet and hands on the gate. I was literally inches away from both of them as they came through! Nothing but my own self control stopping me from getting to them! Well, to Will. A couple minutes with some good shots of the actors, my lovely captioning, and all the background screaming you could ever want to hear can be found here:

Our Mark Wahlberg and Will Ferrell Video

We didn't have anything for them to sign, mostly because who thought we'd be in that situation? Not us. There wasn't time for them to have a lot of one-on-one with their fans right then anyway. Still, I thought they handled the crowd (of "thousands" as our newspaper reported today) really well. They stopped and signed a lot of stuff and did not rush by us. And although we didn't stay for the whole thing or have tickets to see the premier with them, it was a really odd, rare event that we got to experience.

I did get dinner and a show of sorts, so it counts. A really weird date that had a lot of standing around, amusing ourselves, and ended with seeing an actor we both love (and one we don't love... or hate). High fives. Rockin' the obscure date.

My only regret? Not owning a bedazzler and having had the wherewithal and planning to make the world's most awesome B*tch Hunter shirt.

I wish I was kidding about that. I am so lucky my husband puts up with me.