Dastardly May has come and gone. Termites have been treated and should be suffering (if they aren't dead by now). Had a doctor's appointment with a less then stellar test result, but since it came with a "I'm sure it's fine! Let's talk again in a year!" response from the doctor, I'm pretending it's all cool. She didn't even call with the results. She wrote me a very ridiculous letter, which was essentially like you have these abnormal cells you've never had before, but they're probably cool. Or they're cancer. Or they might become cancer. Tomorrow. Or next month. Or next year. Or ten years from now. OR NEVER.
It was so dumb that it was kind of great. I told the hubby that it is going to be fun to explain in every future doctor's appointment that I had these weird results when they go over my history. I'm not looking forward to that. The letter was so long and convoluted that I'm just going to carry it with my insurance card. The hubby, ever helpful, just said, "It's going to be really fun when you get to explain it every year
to the doctor who wrote the letter."
We both had a good laugh at that because it's so damn true.
The A/C is working. Cars are starting. Washing machine is still washing. The oven is another matter but let's not talk about that. I'll repeat: I'm glad to have May in the rear view.
June, though, not really living up to its possibilities. There haven't been any outings on our part. No big dates. We can't even make it to the movies where we have a list of stuff we'd like to see. I need to know if they say "You sunk my battleship!" in Battleship.
The hubby had a couple days off for Memorial Day, which made us all hopeful and stupid. We're going to Cold Stones! We're going to The Dog Museum! We're going to be the last people in America to see The Avengers! Woooooo! Happy Wife is going to shower and put on "outside of the house" clothes every day! WOOOOOOO!
Of course, Mav decided to spoil all those plans in her usual spectacular fashion. During my vet's one week off for vacation. For no known reason, she got what 3 substitute vets think was colitis, and it's been a literal sh*tstorm. Heh.
Sorry.
Anywho, she's had a tough go of it since then. When our normal vet got back, he called about 6 minutes after his day started to check on us. I cannot imagine how high my stress level would be without our vet. Mav's been getting better and starts back on her regular food today. She has only very recently started eating her normal amount of food. This is since Memorial Day, and she's almost 100 lbs now, so she's no delicate flower when it comes to how much food she should be eating. At one point, over a 5 day period, she'd only eaten like one and a half cups of food total. In comparison, she should have 6-8 cups of food per day. Yeah.
We can tell she still feels pretty crappy. It's been a long couple weeks. At one point, I slept on the floor of the office next to her in her dog bed because that was the only place she found any comfort.
Fun side note: sleeping on the floor now is a lot different than it was in high school and college, when I was all "It's good for my back!" during the Academic Decathlon state finals in some semi-nice hotel room or at friends' houses back when I had friends that weren't my husband. Back then, a night on the floor was nothing. Now? I need 3 Aleve just to get up and down the stairs the next morning. Next time, I'm going to grab a second dog bed and sleep on that and try not to think about the level of white trash that might make me.
Never one to miss a beat, Mav did gather up some knowledge during her troubles. What my dog learned was how to spit out pills and that pill pockets have been a trick all along. Which is not good for a dog who is on 2 arthritis pills, a thyroid pill and an allergy pill twice a day, all
when she's feeling good. Add a bunch of additional pills to those when she's feeling bad.
This is my dog, who once ate an entire bunch of bananas, peels and all. Happily and as if she'd never eaten before. One time while we were at a movie, she managed to eat an entire UNOPENED SAM'S CLUB box of these granola bars with ZERO effects on her digestive system. We came home to a house full of wrappers. It was amazing.
Mav says, "Mmmmm, crunchy!"
Once my parents left out Decon (rat poison) when we visited, and she got into that, and the emergency vet there said that they'd never seen a dog actually chow down activated charcoal. You used to be able to point at really anything and say a couple magic words and Mav would go ahead and eat it just in case. She hasn't been one to eat non-edible stuff on her own, not that we leave much to chance in our house anyway, but unless it's unwatched people food (a Happy Wife household no-no), she's pretty good. She's an eater. She gets that from me, for sure. It used to be if she ever got into her own bag of food, no doubt she would just eat until it was gone. Now, she's totally the opposite. Anyone who has had a dog that is food motivated who suddenly has no interest in food knows that it is a horrible thing to witness. You just get this bowling ball of dread in your stomach.
And we saw no signs she got into a damn thing. We hadn't gone anywhere or done anything exciting. We'll probably never know why or how she got so sick this time. Lord.
So, when the hubby and I have had time together, we've just spent it with her. Lots of soccer on the television and before that, we finished Friday Night Lights and started MI-5 on the Instant Netflix. The rest of the time, the hubby is working. Then I'm just sort of sitting over her like some kind of high school stalker. As long as I'm in a position to see her in the room we're in, we're okay. I have to be able to see her. Because there is no warning if she's gonna puke or have a seizure, not even to her. Which is really sad. I can't imagine not knowing something like that is coming and then boom. It comes on so quickly that she doesn't even have time to get up if she's sleeping or curled up resting. Her seizures are literally seconds long now and are completely different than they used to be. We never know when she starts acting off whether she's just having a senior moment, a seizure, or just crazy dog time. We can redirect her back to us pretty quickly, but it's still scary to watch.
At one point I went from praying "Help Mav, stop her hurting, bring her comfort, make her feel better" to "Just get me through this" and I knew when that happened that we were in for it. I'll never be ready for her to go, but the possibility is always there. Hopefully we're turning a corner and are on the road to recovery for a while longer. Either way, we're still just going to be focused on taking care of her and little else.
I try to appreciate spending all the time with her that I can, and it's more of a blessing than a curse. So the hubby and I didn't get to go out. We still are spending the evenings together and most of the weekend when he doesn't have to work. We can still do little things. The times this past week when I've got no sleep with Mav, the hubby went out and picked up supper. Lately, since sleep hasn't been such a stranger, I've been making nicer-than-sandwiches dinners for us. Last night, I made him lamb chops, filling the house up with smoke (they aren't good unless the smoke alarm goes off!), and fresh salad. It was really nice. Tonight, fresh corn on the cob and steaks marinated in a tasty A1, Italian dressing, honey, and red pepper concoction.
I'm oddly grateful for everything right now. Sure, Mav doesn't feel great, but she's better and she's still here. I have the time and ability to be with her. We have a home, so many life things that we're fortunate to have that make everything easier (hi again, washing machine). The hubby's still working away at a job he likes. The people we care about are happy and healthy and even though some are many miles away, they're still with us. The people we've lost have been gone so long the wounds aren't fresh and we're able to live with it more easily. Things other people are dealing with right now in their lives, the economy, family problems, sickness, death, all kinds of shattering things are happening out there. I know enough to know that we're not immune to that. It'll come and it'll be awful, but right now, we're okay. We're incredibly lucky. I don't have a damn thing to complain about.
I guess the trick is to, no matter how crappy things get or how complicated or how busy, we fit in some little things to make it better. Just about anything can overwhelm me if I let it. I think we're in the bones of the marriage part of our marriage right now, and it's still a great place to be. We have a good foundation, which makes everything so much easier when life from the outside is shaky. When I'm focused on Mav and not on much else. We'll get back to all the extra stuff like dating later. I still have goals. Like to not have a pair of shoes in my closet that I haven't worn. And to make it through the day without eating a fruit roll-up (damn you, Sam's Club!). All in good time, Happy Wife. All in good time.
